4 years ago
1. Avoiding things that make us feel anxious.
When we avoid things that make us feel anxious, we are programming ourselves to believe that those things are dangerous for us. Avoidance is fuel for anxiety. To overcome anxiety, we cannot wait ‘until we feel better’; we need to be brave and re-train ourselves to first tolerate, then get used to certain locations or situations.
2. Worrying about public embarrassment if we feel anxious.
It’s very easy to assume that if we are obviously anxious out in public, that people will react badly to us, or judge us. We may often think that people are looking at us whilst experiencing these feelings, but this is often just our perception and far from the truth. If someone does notice, then it may well be someone who cares about your feelings. To overcome anxiety, we need to show a little vulnerability and ask for help. Explaining to someone that you are anxious and that you need a little time or support is often beneficial. It takes away the fear of ‘being noticed’ and gives others the opportunity to be kind.
3. Reducing social connection.
It’s very common to begin to shut our lives down if we suffer with anxiety. We worry about the impact we have on others. It may seem easier to lock ourselves away at home than face social situation. Isolation causes emotional pain, which also fuels anxiety. We all need social connection, and we all need to feel that we belong. As challenging as it may be, we need to make an effort to go out and connect with others.
4. Believing that we will get better through time alone.
This is simply not true. We need work on our mind-set to help us through. We need to challenge ourselves and face the things that make us feel anxious. We need to seek help and knowledge to help us rise. No-one ever frees themselves from anxiety sat at home waiting for it to eventually disappear.
5. Seeing anxiety as the enemy.
If we see anxiety as the enemy, then we will remain in a constant psychological battle. We need to see anxiety as it really is – a friend trying to protect us. If anxiety knocks on the door, imagine welcoming it in, imagine sitting it down and making it a cup of tea. Thank it for being there but remind it that you don’t always need protecting. Imagine taking anxiety as a friend into situations in which you feel anxious. Imagine holding its hand, (it sometimes helps to imagine a little person) and help it see that you can do and experience different things without any danger.
