5 Things You Should NEVER Say To Your Teenager
As parents, we don’t always get it right. Sometimes we say the wrong thing. Sometimes we do the wrong thing. But we always have the best intention and do the best with the knowledge and the resources that we have within any given moment.
Having worked with both teenagers and parents, I’m aware of the 5 biggest mistakes parents make when communicating with their teen. So, I’d like to offer you some extra knowledge. These are the top 5 things that you should never say to your teenager.
You Need To Get A Sensible Job
Your definition of sensible is probably very different from theirs. As a coach, the most sensible thing I’d advise a teenager to do is to pursue their passion and follow their heart. The least sensible thing that they could do is to be guided by the opinions of others. They will end of living a life with regret. Your teenagers were given skills and talents for a reason. Let them use them. Let them choose their own path.
Life Is About Working Hard To Pay The Bills
This is not true. It is a belief that may have been imposed on you within your younger years. It’s likely that parents or peers ‘gifted’ this belief to you trying their best to guide you. Their experience does not have to be your teenagers experience, or your experience. Who told you that life was about working hard to pay the bills? Who were you influenced by? And who are you now influencing as a result? I believe that life is about happiness and joy. And I believe that success will follow when we follow our hearts and do what we love. (Research proves that happier children go on to create bigger incomes). What could your teenager achieve if they believed the same?
If You Don’t Do Well At School You Won’t Amount To Anything
So very untrue. Some of the happiest and most successful people that I know flunked school and left with very few qualifications. Success is not dependant on academic qualifications. It is however dependant on attitude and self-belief. Our society is so conditioned to believe that success relies on grades and it’s likely that you have been conditioned to believe the same. Start to look around for people that demonstrate that this belief is NOT TRUE. Maybe start with Richard Branson?
Life Isn’t About Choices But Necessities
Sorry. You’ve got this wrong. Life is about choices and empowering our teenagers to understand that they have choices. Yes, there will be things that they need to do along the way. But they should spend the majority of their time doing what they want to do. If you feel restricted yourself then maybe it’s time to start working on your own personal development? What are you believing that is restricting your life? What would you need to believe to have more choice yourself?
Why Can’t You Be Like Your Brother/Sister?
Be grateful that your children are unique. Don’t compare your children, ever. They are not meant to be the same. They are all beautifully unique with their own skills and talents. Comparison will rob a teenager of confidence. Don’t take away what they own. Grow what they own. Celebrate their uniqueness. Appreciate their difference. Love them for who they are, not who you want them to be.
Check out my blog about communicating with teenagers here: https://www.mariahocking.com/5-ways-to-communicate-with-your-teenager/
Oh, and if you want a GREAT BOOK that a teenage will love then check out: The Art Of Being A Brilliant Teenager!
(Please note that all links on my blogs are Amazon affiliate links. This does not make any difference to you at all, it just means I may receive a small commission for products sold through this link. This helps to keep me supplied with coffee as I continue to write and inspire!)
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