Why Your Partner May Be Driving You Crazy and What You Can Do About It
Is your partner driving your crazy? Do you find it difficult to understand their thinking process or their actions?
I’m about to share a secret with you which could benefit your relationship immensely. And it’s something that no-one else will ever tell you.
But first, I’d like to share a story about myself and my husband.
My husband and I love to travel. We have always had amazing experiences abroad both together and with our family. But we always seemed to have a problem booking the holiday together.
I would see a destination and feel a pull inside. Obviously ensuring that my husband liked the idea, I would then want to book the flights or accommodation immediately. Knowing that we were booked allowed the feelings of excitement to begin.
My husband would be incredibly unreasonable, or so I thought at the time. The minute I suggested booking he would ‘dig his heels in’ and almost panic at the thought of booking so soon. He thought I was being ‘too hasty’ and not thinking about it enough before committing.
It seemed to reach stale mate every time. Neither of us would give in. It would happen whilst trying to book every single holiday. He would relentlessly pursue making the booking. He would relentlessly research the destination. Not only would he research flights and the destination, but ways to get to the airport, flight times, things to do at the location, restaurants in the area and countless other details. It drove me crazy. I drove him crazy. There were nights that we slept in separate beds through frustration.
Until I discovered THE SECRET.
I’m not crazy or unreasonable. And neither is he. We just like dealing with different sizes of information and therefore have different needs.
I am a ‘global’person. I see the big picture and I don’t concern myself with details.
My husband is a ‘specific’ or ‘detail’ person. He loves details and needs to get them in order before he can see the big picture.
Discovering this, both my husband and I recognised that neither of us was right nor wrong. We just needed to find ways to meet both of our needs when booking a holiday.
I now know that I need to give him time to sort through the details so that he feels comfortable to book. He understands that researching forever will frustrate me so allows me to set an agreed date to book. Booking holidays is now far more pleasurable and we seem to spend more time in the same bed!
Think for a moment about your relationship. Are you a ‘global’ person? Do you see the big picture? Or do you love ‘details’ and small bits of information?
Which category does your partner fall into? If you are both ‘global’ or both ‘detail’ people, then you may understand the benefits.
It’s important to understand the neither is right or wrong and there are advantages to both.
Big picture thinkers are great at motivating and getting things done. They often make quick decisions and can create momentum. But if they neglect to pay attention to detail (because they often find detail boring), then they may not always succeed in their efforts because things may go wrong.
‘Specific’ people are great at ensuring that every step necessary is taken. They are very useful for noticing potential problems or errors that could occur. They make great accountants or bookkeepers. You also often find these people working in I.T. But sometimes their focus on detail can be time consuming and delay progress.
So, it could be said that both benefit each other. But it’s essential that both parties understand the needs of each other in order for this relationship to work effectively. This is true both within love and in business.
Never under-estimate the power of knowing THIS SECRET. It could save you countless hours arguing and endless nights in cold and lonely bed!
(Can you believe that my husband has literally just walked in the door and said, “Bloody buggers, Felix bought out new cat food in a large 40 pack box, but each pack is only 80 grams instead of 100, so actually you are getting a lot less if you look carefully!) Detailed indeed!!
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